"Perfectionism is not a way to avoid shame. Perfectionism is a form of shame. Where we struggle with perfectionism, we struggle with shame." Brené Brown Recently my blog was weaponized. That phrasing might sound odd to someone who has never experienced abuse. Abusers find ways to take beloved, or even mundane, things and use them as weapons against their victims. Specific blog posts were suggested as reasons why I was behaving poorly as a parent and my time with my children s

My friend says my paintings scare her. My response: "How do you think they make me feel? I live with this." *TRIGGER WARNING. Sexual Assault, Rape, Domestic Violence, PTSD. ** I've deleted and rewritten this post several times. In my head and physically. There really are no words to eloquently express how I'm feeling and what I'm thinking. A string of expletives, while closer, would still be lacking. Hence, the paintings. Even they aren't enough. I've seen many depictions of

There's a line from the movie Shrek that has stuck with me from my first viewing. Probably because everyone quoted it over and over. "Layers. Onions have layers. Ogres have layers... You get it? We both have layers." I agree with Shrek's self observation, and Donkey's reaction: "You know, not everybody likes onions." While I have never enjoyed thinking of myself as an onion, that was an eye opener for me. Humans are not one dimensional. We have this weird desire to classify e